Mental Health and homemaking

It's the most wonderful time of the year. Christmas is upon us, and we're all in cozy mode, baking and decorating - making our homes perfect for the holidays. But this time of the year is heavily influenced by consumerism. Shopping for decorations and gifts can take our mind off so many things. It's easy to forget the difficult stuff and not deal with the issues that bother us deep inside.

This is an unusual topic for me to write about. Usually I write about interior design and cooking, but recently, I've had to deal with a lot of stuff that messed with my head and I started thinking: The overall feel of a home can be directly linked to the well-being of the mother/wife of the home. It's logical if you think about it. If you're not well, you don't have the energy to provide the things that make a warm and inviting home.

When we think of self-care, we usually think of taking care of our body and appearance. But taking care of our mental health should be just as - if not more - important. For a lot of people, finding the right type of help is really difficult. They might be surrounded by people who think it's embarrassing, self-indulgent and unnecessary to go to a therapist, or they might not have the money for it. In my country, especially amongst the older generations, unfortunately it is not uncommon to think like this. That is an ancient and very very toxic attitude towards mental health and the worst thing is that it discourages younger people from seeking help. 

If there's one thing you take away from reading this it should be that it is always OK to take care of your soul and seek help if you feel like you need it. Think about your physical health: when you feel like you might be sick, you go to the doctor for help and nobody has a problem with that. And even if you're not sick, you still take care of your body by exercising, taking a bath, or going to a spa from time to time. Why should it be different when it comes to your mental health? If you feel like you have serious problems, you go to a professional psychologist or a spiritual guide or healer (whatever feels right to you), but even if you don't, you could still talk to someone about your everyday problems.

This might be more difficult for some people than others, and the reason I'm writing about this in connection with homemaking is that it might be especially hard for you to open up and talk to someone if you're a housewife/mother. Getting married and having kids might distance you from your friends and the outside world. You might feel like you're alone with your problems and if your friends are not in the same boat, they might not understand. Making friends with other housewives/moms is a good solution, but for many women it's not that easy. Talking to your husband is also a good idea but let's face it: at the end of the day, we rarely have the time and energy to talk to our spouse about serious stuff, especially with kids around. And also, sometimes we just need another female to talk to. So, if you don't have anyone around that could help, SEEK them out. Find a therapist or even just a manicurist, hair dresser, or masseur who you can talk to. I used to have a problem with my ribs and I used to go physical therapy for that. While my therapist did her thing she asked me how I was doing and I just talked to her and even that little chat made me feel so much lighter and more balanced. So remember, help can come in many forms, it doesn't have to be an expensive psychologist, in most countries there are even some non-profit organizations that could help you.

So my advice is - Focus on your mental health this season! Give yourself the gift of self-love by seeking the right type of help, even if it's just talking to someone who really listens. Believe me, you will see the difference in yourself, your family and your home as well.